Best Marriage Questions We Ask Every Week

A few years ago I heard about the Navigator’s Council - a tool created by a couple I follow and love: Jeremy and Audrey Roloff. In a nutshell, there are 6 questions they ask each other every single week, to stay in a place of healthy communication in their marriage.

Will and I have adopted these questions as our very own, and every Sunday night, we always try to ask them to one another, no matter how crazy our schedules are:

• What brought you joy this week?

• What was something that was hard this week?

• What’s one specific thing I can do for you this week?

• How can I pray for you this week?

• Is there anything that’s been left unspoken or unsaid? (Convictions, confessions, unresolved hurt?)

• What’s a dream, desire or thought that’s been on the forefront of your mind this week?

The Roloffs also add, “We always end our time in prayer, and once a month we ask two additional questions that we don’t feel are necessary to ask each week:”

• How are we stewarding our finances?

• How is our sex life?

•••

Okay so stop and think with me: If you were to really do these questions every week for the rest of your lives, if you were to really and truly take the time to answer them honestly, don’t you think your marriage would be SO much better? I know we have benefitted from them so much. It’s always so good for me to hear the highlight and challenge of Will’s past week, what he’s looking forward to the next week, and how I can pray for him. The question that asks “Is there anything left unspoken or unsaid?” is incredibly powerful, and while it can sometimes be difficult, it has probably brought us more unity than any other.

Coming from two sets of divorced parents (on my side and on Will’s side), I can’t help but wonder if these questions would have changed the course of both of our parents marriages if they had had them. Will and I are very aware that we have to actively fight for our marriage. These questions are a small way to do just that every single week.

You can order the journal, or you can simply ask the questions as we do every week!

PS. Beating the 50 Percent is probably my favorite marriage blog. Really good stuff over there!