The Contentment Challenge is OVER!

You guys.

WE DID IT.

3 months of no shopping for anything “extra!” No clothes, no decor, no nothin’ unless it was an absolute NEED. This was my 6th time doing the Contentment Challenge, and it, as always, taught me so much about myself.

This time, it was way less about stuff or me.

The first three months of this year were marked with sickness, frustration, lack of child care, and an all around feeling that every time I made a plan, they would get cancelled. YES, that was the theme of my life for 3 months BEFORE this Covid-19 craziness started happening. God is teaching me to dig in deep right where I am. This fast from shopping is like a jump start to get through the top, artificial layers to what is really happening beneath the surface. I think it’s weird and wild that we can medicate so easily with purchasing things to make us feel better. It’s been quite eye opening for me. Here’s a quick recap of what I learned this time around.

Month One

There is always a detox period in the first month - 2 weeks of stopping my thumb from the habit of going to Amazon, shopping at grocery stores instead of Target, or ONLY placing pick up orders at Target if I can help it. It’s a simple changing of habits, but it’s GOOD and eye opening. You would think I might not need a detox after doing this for 6 times, but it’s pretty remarkable how easily it is to form those shopping habits quickly when you return back to “normal.”

Month Two

This is where it started to get real. My struggle with contentment didn’t lie in the “not getting stuff” when I wanted it. For some context, I had planned to work 1 day a week this year. I had some exciting projects and podcast interviews and ideas I was excited to flesh out - not to mention some time to exercise, get outside, and be alone - to have a simple break from the 3 tiny children who I love so dearly who demand every bit of my attention from 7am until 7:30pm every single day. This felt like a healthy place for me this year.

8 weeks into the year would have equaled 8 “freedom days” as I named them : days for my sanity, for my health, for my work. And our childcare only worked 4 of them. There was one stretch in February where I went 3 weeks without any childcare due to our sitter being sick, Milly getting the flu, and me being sick.

Being chronically sick has been incredibly defeating - physically (it’s borderline debilitating to take care of 3 kids when you have flu like symptoms and no one wants to be near your house and your husband is working and two of the kids are sick too) and emotionally (I broke down crying on the reg). It was a hard, dark season.

Enter: contentment. This time around, I struggled to find my contentment in those placed. I learned how to express my anger, how to lose my mind a little bit when I felt like I couldn’t take it anymore, how to dig deeper into being content right where I was when all my expectations of a good rhythm and fulfilling work and a healthy year were taken from me week after week after week.

But I dug. I thought about all the things I was thankful for in the midst of the hard and the anger. I was so grateful that Will was so helpful, that Sammy Jo kept the podcast going, that every morning the sun rose again. I was thankful for a warm bed and doctors and medicine and grandparents showing up with face masks and gloves and food. It was a hard month, but learning to be content in a season I did not ask for was not what I expected this time around.

Month Three

Well, you know where we all stand now. Month three is this crazy month in the history of our world that we’ve never seen before. Talk about cancelled plans and sickness! I honestly have felt like the entire world has joined me in what my winter already looked like : sickness, isolation, loneliness. But I’m also getting used to looking for the good in all of it. The sickness in our own household is lifting, slowly but surely. I’m seeing the beauty of making memories as our little family - just the 5 of us, together. And more than ever, I’m realizing that stuff is not what the good stuff of life is made of. It always was and always will be the relationships of those around us.